Is a Trial Separation Right for You and Your Partner? A trial separation may have crossed your mind many times as you went through the stresses and strains of a relationship that often felt like a life sentence. You’ve probably had fantasies of a trial separation where you don’t have to give up everything forever [...]
Difficulty Mourning a Loss Stirs up Undigested Losses from the Past Difficulty Mourning a loss when the customary rituals of joining and supporting grieving family and friends are absent during a lock-down makes that loss harder to process. Difficulty mourning a recent loss brings up waves of loss and grief from previous losses, making you [...]
The Relationship Triangle Are you caught in a relationship triangle with your mother and father, having to choose sides and loyalty? Maybe you are trapped in a triangle with a parent and a step parent; or with a partner and his or her ex; perhaps you are pinned into a triangle with your partner and [...]
How to Get Over Rejection How to get over rejection - when all you yearn for is for your loved one to embrace you again? How to get over rejection - when you feel that you’ll never be okay until your precious one returns to salve your wounds and make you whole again? How to [...]
Midlife Crisis – Surviving the midlife transition Midlife crises happen to men and women when they have got to a stable place in their lives, especially when and because they originally got together through crisis in their younger lives. What is midlife crisis? A midlife crisis is a discomfort with and confusion about what appears [...]
Love-hate Relationship Traps Do you feel caught in a love-hate relationship that you can’t escape? Maybe you have tried several times to leave but get seduced into staying because your partner morphs into an irresistibly affectionate, tuned in and available person. In that moment you are washed with the ‘love’ part of the love-hate relationship. [...]
Why Do Breakups Hurt Even When You Want Them? Is breaking up the only way you can think of to end the hurt in your relationship? Don't you really want to fix things and get back to a place where everything is smooth and easy? Have you reached out to listen, understand and mend fences, [...]
Why Can't I Let Go of My Ex? “Why can’t I let go of my ex?” you ask, gritting your teeth with anger as you deal with another wave of exasperation when there is a clash. This is a common problem and one that often brings people into therapy. They feel that they can’t get [...]
Have you ever been accused of having “abandonment issues”? Maybe you feel abandoned when that phrase is used as a reason to walk away from you instead of working through the problems at hand. Perhaps you believe you have abandonment issues because past relationships have ended making you feel abandoned, unloved and unimportant. To some extent everyone feels abandoned from time to time, but most get over it, experiencing it as a passing blip on the radar, that soon disappears in the richness of a relationship that offers other fulfilling moments. These blips don’t destroy an otherwise firm and secure connection to your significant other. It’s when those blips feel like huge meteors reigning down on you and destroying your footing, taking away your confidence and purpose, that experiences of abandonment can negatively influence your romantic relationships.
Imagine if your partner suddenly said they were going to leave you? Would you be shocked, shaken, stunned and destabilized? You would feel insecure and stressed. Then you were probably imagining that everything was fine and that you had the near perfect relationship. Hardly any arguments, shared jobs and good sex. But what about the emotional intimacy?