Helping my client – Trade Guilt for Pride in Self-Care

“I don’t know why I wait till the last minute to do things I want to do.” This is what Tessa, a 35-year-old natural birth coach told me after a series of realizations that she only acts when there is a sense of urgency – propelling her to act in the moment, even though [...]

By |2025-10-20T16:59:31+00:00October 20th, 2025|Fear and Panic, Inner Conflicts|Comments Off on Helping my client – Trade Guilt for Pride in Self-Care

How Unresolved Sibling Rivalry in Childhood Leads to Co-dependent Adult Relationships

Unresolved Sibling Rivalry - the narrative of the co-dependent adult couple “I hate it when Bianca makes me feel small and incompetent, but I’d feel like a terrible person if I abandoned her,” said 35-year-old digital advertising consultant, Javier. “I hate it when Javier won’t let me out of his sight and taunts me [...]

By |2025-10-01T13:09:46+00:00October 1st, 2025|Anger Management Counseling, co-dependency, Couples Counseling, Family of Origin Counseling, Insecurity Counseling|Comments Off on How Unresolved Sibling Rivalry in Childhood Leads to Co-dependent Adult Relationships

Helping clients 4: Helping Couples Get Unstuck

Couples who come to therapy often complain that they cycle around the same issues with no resolution, feeling stagnant, exhausted, and hopeless in the process. In essence they are stuck. Sonia a 33-year old massage therapist wanted her partner Dean a 34-year-old pet-grooming service owner to attend couples therapy to make him commit to [...]

By |2025-09-10T19:56:58+00:00September 10th, 2025|Communication Problems, couples therapy, Dreams, Uncategorized|Comments Off on Helping clients 4: Helping Couples Get Unstuck

Hope and Hopelessness – How They Work to Manage the Threat of Reality

There are two ways I hear clients talk about the issue of hope. One goes something like this: “I have to keep hope alive that my partner will change, or else there is no point!” The other takes a different path: “I just feel hopeless, my partner’s never going to change, so I might [...]

By |2025-09-01T05:04:44+00:00September 1st, 2025|Anxiety Treatment, Family of Origin Counseling, Fear and Pani, Helplessness, Individual Counseling, Inner Conflicts|Comments Off on Hope and Hopelessness – How They Work to Manage the Threat of Reality

How I helped My Client (3) – Manage Chronic Insomnia and Sleep Like a Baby

Insomnia dogged 36-year-old Phillipe all his life. He hated not being able to control his body and make it do the right thing, just as he hated all parts of himself that were not perfect. Insomnia was a sign of imperfection and a sign that he wasn’t normal – making him feel defeated in [...]

By |2025-08-19T19:04:09+00:00August 19th, 2025|Anger Stress and Health, Inner Conflicts, Uncategorized|Comments Off on How I helped My Client (3) – Manage Chronic Insomnia and Sleep Like a Baby

How I Helped My Client 2 – Showing How She Set Herself Up to Deny Her Deepest Wish

How I helped My Client  – Showing How She Set Herself Up to Deny Her Deepest Wish Susan a 38-year-old Dental Hygienist had always felt that she got a raw deal in life. Unloved and neglected by her parents, she was now rejected by her partner Mick when she made overtures for closeness, affection, [...]

By |2025-07-22T19:07:45+00:00July 22nd, 2025|Anxiety Treatment, Depression Counseling, Inner Conflicts, Insecurity Counseling, Intimacy, relationship issues, Uncategorized|Comments Off on How I Helped My Client 2 – Showing How She Set Herself Up to Deny Her Deepest Wish

Different Anxiety Types in Partners Create Tension Between Insecurity and Need for Control

“I’m really anxious - you haven’t spoken to me since last night!” Nico said to his partner Tamara when she nagged him to book his vacation dates at work so they could plan the family vacation. “I’m anxious that it’ll be too late and we won’t get a good cabin on the cruise ship,” [...]

By |2025-07-12T16:58:35+00:00July 12th, 2025|Anxiety therapy, Couples Counseling, Insecurity Counseling, Uncategorized|Comments Off on Different Anxiety Types in Partners Create Tension Between Insecurity and Need for Control

Helping my clients 1 – Understand a Shameful Dream

Here’s how I helped David last week – Am I a pedophile becuase of a dream I had? David, a 37-year-old electrical engineer had been working on his sense of entrapment in romantic relationships for some time in his indivdual therapy with me. Recently he brought a dream to a session and it turned [...]

By |2025-07-01T18:53:55+00:00July 1st, 2025|Dreams, Family of Origin Counseling, Intimacy|Comments Off on Helping my clients 1 – Understand a Shameful Dream

Why Your Efforts to “Cheer Them Up” Doesn’t Work for Depressive Personality Styles

Poppy let out a big sigh as her 32-year-old brother Josh said that he had tried her latest suggestion of walking in nature motivation but it hadn’t helped with his fatigue and low motivation. Josh’s big sister had been trying to buoy him up for as long as she could remember, to no effect. [...]

By |2025-06-09T20:37:41+00:00June 9th, 2025|Anger Issues, Depression Counseling, Family of Origin Counseling, Inner Conflicts|Comments Off on Why Your Efforts to “Cheer Them Up” Doesn’t Work for Depressive Personality Styles

Torn Between Your Parents and Your Partner – Unable to Choose

Howard couldn’t commit to his girlfriend Melinda. He was torn between her and his parents. He didn’t want to choose, and hoped that Melinda, a 33-year-old food writer would tolerate his umbilical connection with his parents; because being cut off from them was worse than the idea of losing Melinda. Howard couldn’t separate from [...]

By |2025-05-13T18:28:28+00:00May 13th, 2025|Communication Problems, Couples Counseling, Individual Counseling, Inner Conflicts, Intimacy, Separation and Loss|Comments Off on Torn Between Your Parents and Your Partner – Unable to Choose
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