“I’m really anxious - you haven’t spoken to me since last night!” Nico said to his partner Tamara when she nagged him to book his vacation dates at work so they could plan the family vacation. “I’m anxious that it’ll be too late and we won’t get a good cabin on the cruise ship,” [...]
The power of touch is profound in romantic relationships. Touch serves a multitude of functions right from the moment of birth. The sensation of skin on skin offers a feeling of safety, security, and calmness that lets you just be, take everything in and grow without having to use up your attention span and [...]
Stonewalling is a form of passive aggressive interaction where one person in a close relationship withdraws from the other, to punish you for wounding them and making them feel insecure. In order to manage the threat of that insecurity they turn the tables and attempt to shift the insecurity to the other person. It’s [...]
An emotionally abusive person doesn’t just diss you or call you names. An emotionally abusive person is much more subtle and has three specific ways that make you feel bad in return for feeling powerful and good. It’s important to have their back story to understand what made them into abusers, what the reward [...]
Perimenopausal rage is real, straining and threatening the relationship between partners. Perimenopausal rage is a common symptom on the journey to full menopause, (between 3-4 years), as levels of estrogen drop and propel changes in systems that control dopamine, and serotonin, making women more likely to have mood swings. Stress hormones such as cortisol [...]
Letting go aint easy, as the song say. Isn’t it infuriating when a close friend, or family member tells you to “get over it,” or “just let go.” It’s a double whammy – not only are you already feeling unstable through a wound, but the intolerance of loved ones makes you feel even less [...]
Pre-empty nest fears come at you suddenly, and gradually invade your waking hours. Pre-empty nest fears start when your child says, “I want to make my own play date!” It’s that bitter sweet moment when you are simultaneously relieved that your child is pushing towards doing things independently but also doesn’t need you in [...]
Three Ways to Make Bad Feelings Less Sticky Every client I have worked with shares their despair that their bad feelings won’t go away, and that nothing they do makes it better. Getting distracted for a while by being busy; sleeping; vegetating in front of a screen or immersing yourself in a job doesn’t [...]
How Rumination and Insecurity Become Team Players in Romantic Breakups Rumination and insecurity go hand in hand. Insecurity is a destabilizing experience. It takes the ground from under you. There is nothing to hold onto because you feel lost, wobbly and untethered. Along comes a rope to cling to – a mental strategy [...]
https://losangeleswestsidetherapy.com/couples-counseling/How are you wired for love? Wired for love – alternating power plays Cole, a 36 year-old painter and decorator adored his wife Mona, a 38-year-old city administrator had been through grueling breakups with their previous partners and come together to fill the holes and soothe each other. But as the wounds of loss [...]
