Trauma in the Body Trauma in the body shows up in a variety of ways, often combined with one another, for example insomnia and back pain. Trauma in the body is a sign that some parts of your natural development were disturbed and twisted, causing unbearable shock to the system. You were helpless to respond [...]
Parenting an Angry Child – The Three ‘A’s of success Parenting an angry child who can be unpredictable, explosive and overwhelming is one of the toughest jobs ever. To be scared of your own child who seems threatening, sets up a massive rush of adrenaline in you the parent – just as your child is [...]
Spouses with depression suffer intense marital problems due to a history of childhood trauma and emotional abuse Spouses with depression face insecure and rocky marital relations. When one spouse has depression, it’s hard for the non-depressed spouse to feel connected and alive in the relationship. But when both spouses are depressed, the stakes go through [...]
Are you a man who is an obedient, loyal, dependable guy with your female partner? Do you give her the authority to make decisions, take the lead and initiative on parenting, spending money and organizing your social life? Then you may be very conficted about having no power yourself just so you can ensure that you are loved and cared for. Maybe you just don't know which part of you to go with? What will the consequences be if you take on a more authoritative role? How will it be if you continue to avoid asserting yourself? You know that inside you there is a raging bull ready to smash everything that smacks of needing to depend on your female partner for care.
If you have ever felt envious in the tiniest bit you will know how it can eat your soul alive and make you unavailable for an emotionally intimate relationship. You will be so filled with envious rage that others have what you should have, deserve and have been deprived of that there is no room for anything else. On the other hand if you have felt the envious rage of a loved one thrown your way, you may be blindsided by its force and intensity. You may not be able to see where the rage is coming from, let alone understand that there is envy behind it, because to you there is no reason for it. Either way it's important that envy doesn't destabilize your relationship. Without recognition and attention to reducing it, envy shows itself in aggressive ways, turning an accepting love into one of possession.
It's infuriating when your best laid plans fall apart at the last minute. You had it all going smoothly. You took care of all the snags, got everything prepared in the right order and had all the necessary funds for your plan to succeed. But then out of the blue it crumbles. You are angry, bitterly disappointed, and want to give up. The stress wears you out. This pattern happens over and over again, that just when you are on the point of success and growth you find yourself back at the start line! Why does this happen to you on a regular basis?
On top of a grueling day at work dealing with a staff shortage and patient crises, thirty-three year old physician Phil felt another load heaped on him as soon as he got home. His twenty-eight year old wife Melissa demanded he take care of the dogs and bring in the heavy shopping items while she got ready for her night shift at the hospital where she was acting charge nurse. He had driven home with the weighty concern that he had given a patient the wrong medication in all the chaos of the day. His anxiety levels shot up as he started to imagine being sued, let go from the clinic and having his medical license revoked. He felt like a slave to the pressure put on him by Melissa’s trivial needs compared to the terror he was experiencing in relation to the seriousness of his situation.
Do you find yourself telling little white lies to avoid arguments or to avoid hurting or enraging a friend, loved one or colleague? Then you are not alone. It’s human and understandable when you want to get out of a mess or stop one from happening. But did you know that even the smallest of lies can make you sick, feel bad about yourself, demotivate you and ultimately destroy your relationships? A crisis that rocked Winston’s peace of mind forced him to come to terms with the damage he was doing to himself when he constantly lied to his girlfriend and others in the mistaken belief that he was taking care of their feelings. After a series of lies that became part of his way of keeping the status quo he found himself with a constant sinus infection, fatigue and anxiety about his self-worth.
Do you keep silent in conversations with certain of your friends and or loved ones because you think there is no point talking? Are you anticipating being made to feel silly, stupid, and then shut down? Perhaps you decide to just get through the interaction without taking the risk, but you pay a price of gagging yourself. Does the anger build later on? Do you fume and try to exert yourself in other ways to compensate? Whatever you do, the same fear rules you and makes relationships stressful and unsatisfying. Unless you find your sense of entitlement to be a player and participate. Watch this video and you will find out how to do that so that you don't have to suffer that old anticipatory fear that keeps you small, silent and furious. Give yourself the pleasure of making sure you have healthy emotional intimacy that is the foundation of all good relationships.
Do you get up your courage to break it off with your girlfriend or boyfriend and then chicken out? Do you regret not being able to go through with what you know you need to do and get angry with yourself? Are you anxious and afraid of hurting your partner's feelings and being the bad guy? Are you praying that your boyfriend or girlfriend will get the message and break up with you instead? Then you are experiencing an overabundance of guilt that leads to stress, insomnia, and lack of concentration on your job. The harder you try to be gentle, give hints, be nice or wait for the perfect moment the worse it gets and your frustration will make you do or say things that make you look like an uncaring monster. So watch this video and get a really good practical tip on making the breakup less personal
