Relationship Advice Tips from Dr. Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.

grabbing woman 199x300 - How to Turn Envy into Togetherness

If you have ever felt envious in the tiniest bit you will know how it can eat your soul alive and make you unavailable for an emotionally intimate relationship. You will be so filled with envious rage that others have what you should have, deserve and have been deprived of that there is no room for anything else. Feeling envious makes you feel insecure and stressful , diminishing your sense of personal control.

On the other hand if you have felt the envious rage of a loved one thrown your way, you may be blindsided by its force and intensity. You may not be able to see where the rage is coming from, let alone understand that there is envy behind it, because to you, there is no reason for it.

Either way it’s important that envy doesn’t destabilize your relationship. Conflicts build up, communication is tense and ineffectual at best and combative at worst. Emotional intimacy wanes as the relationship gasps to stay alive.

Without recognition and attention to reducing it, envy shows itself in aggressive ways, turning an accepting love into one of possession.

This video tells you the story of a wife who was envious of her in-laws and her own children. Therapy helped her husband deal with the attacks she leveled against him when he gave attention to the kids or other family members. To her, he was giving away WHAT BELONGED TO HER. Therapy helped them to understand the dynamics of envy and mute it by working on togetherness. Learn how!



AUTHOR OF ‘Now You Want Me, Now You Don’t! Fear of Intimacy: ten ways to recognize it and ten ways to manage it in your relationships.”

Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D. 2015


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Disclaimer: this video is for informational and educative purposes only. Dr. Raymond is not responsible for any reactions you may have when reading the content or using the suggestions therein. Interacting with this material does not constitute a therapeutic relationship with Dr. Jeanette Raymond.