“I’m waiting for my partner to change” is a phrase that appears to come up over and over again in my work with individuals who are struggling in relationships that are sometimes safe and satisfying, but at other times devaluing, diminishing and dismissive. Waiting for a partner to change – when does it start? [...]
Three Ways a Relationship Crisis Benefits Communication, Intimacy and Self-care The very term relationship crisis makes your heart stop, your blood pressure sky rocket and a flood of adrenalin preparing you for fight/flight/or freeze. It’s unpleasant and threatening. Most of us want to avoid a relationship crisis and do everything we can to avoid [...]
Three Crucial Ways to Feeling Loved in a Pandemic Feeling loved in a pandemic is problematic when there is more pressure on partners to make each feel valued when the world feels so unpredictable. Scared that her family may become infected with Covid-19, Claire a 35-year-old optometrist was extra careful about cleaning everything before it [...]
How Worrying and Boredom Team up to Keep You Stuck Worrying and boredom are two of the most complaints I hear from clients, but more pronounced during the pandemic lockdown. Here are some of the remarks regarding worrying and boredom that have stuck with me: “I worry that my partner will make me the bad [...]
Marriage After Infidelity You are stunned, disoriented and your whole world has shattered. You can’t believe that your partner cheated on you and lied to you about the affair. You want to throw the cheater into an incinerator together with the disgust, betrayal and rejection. But there is another part of you that wonders if [...]
Feeling trapped in a loveless marriage is unbearable. But it doesn't have to mean a life time of suffering if you discover the profound beliefs that keep you trapped and prevent you from being yourself and worthy of love in the marriage.
Fear of discovering your true self is kept in check by obsessive - compulsive behaviors and thoughts. It creates a diversion with the false promise of making you feel in control and safe. But discovering your true self will come in the form of a crisis from within you, propelling you to honor your personal integrity and enjoy rather than hide from life.
Personal Empowerment is Crucial for Comfortable Relationships Personal empowerment means you are in charge of your life; your choices, the outcomes and consequences. Without a well-developed sense of personal empowerment, you give other people power over you; allow them to make decisions for you and then get angry and resentful that your needs and feelings [...]
Unrealistic Expectations Breed Self-Defeating Behaviors Unrealistic expectations may be your biggest enemy! Do you ever want something really badly, but then when it comes it sucks? It drops like a massive bomb of disappointment and lets you down. Either it isn’t the right way, or given with the wrong attitude, or not in the right [...]
Fear of Becoming Like Your Parents Fear of becoming like your parents results in anger, anxiety and panic Anxiety and tension gripped 36-year old radiologist Luis, a married with two young daughters when he got a Facebook invitation to join his college mates in Los Vegas for a reunion event. He didn’t want to go, [...]
