Mature Dependency in Relationships

By |2016-12-13T05:19:12+00:00October 17th, 2016|Couples Counseling, couples therapy, Intimacy, relationship issues|

Dependency in relationships is a necessary feature of bonding and attachment. One of the most important parts of a strong and lasting romantic connection between couples is the creation of a healthy and mature dependency in the relationship. Fear of Being Used Prevents Mature Dependency in Relationships Many individuals and couples come to therapy because they are struggling with an immature dependency which makes the relationship unstable and scary. For example Jose a client in his thirties complained of a lack of closeness between him and his wife. He longed for her to take care of him when he was down, ill or conflicted about something. But each time she reached out he would refuse her offers, fearful of having to pay the price of it later. He anticipated being made to do extra child-care duties, or have his current difficulty used against him in the future. Any care that came from his wife became dangerous rather than comforting. Better to protect himself by denying his natural dependency feelings that would have soothed him and brought the care he yearned for. Jose was stuck in an immature unsatisfying fearful dependency, that made it impossible for the couple to express freely.

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The Art of Love Is Fluidily

By |2018-02-26T18:56:40+00:00September 8th, 2016|Communication Issues, Couples Counseling, relationship issues|

The Art Of Love Is Fluidly Do you believe in the art of loving? Are you using the art of loving in your relationship, or are you still searching for the magic? Perhaps you practice the art of love on your partner, but don’t get any in return. This disparity is common and creates the [...]

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Lack of Desire For Your Partner

By |2016-12-13T05:19:12+00:00August 18th, 2016|Couples Counseling, couples therapy, relationship issues|

 Lack of Desire For Your Partner Does your relationship lack the physical intimacy you once enjoyed? Is there a lack of desire for sexual passion in your relationship? Physical intimacy may taper off as you and your relationship age. It may make the relationship feel stale, and lead to affairs in order to feel attractive [...]

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Fallen Out of Love? The Secret to Being in Love Again

By |2016-12-13T05:19:12+00:00August 9th, 2016|Communication Issues, Communication Problems, Couples Counseling, couples therapy, relationship issues|

  Fallen Out of Love? Here's How to Find it Again Does it seem that you have fallen out of love with your partner? Do you wonder why you are in a relationship with a partner who always makes you feel bad? Perhaps you fantasize about walking away as far as you can just to [...]

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Building a Basic Trust Creates True Love

By |2017-05-22T23:12:54+00:00August 1st, 2016|Couples Counseling, Insecurity Counseling|

Do you have a solid basic trust that your partner will share in your experience when you share something important? What’s the first image that comes into your mind when you imagine sharing your feelings or opinion? If it’s one of deflation, then you are missing the second most important feature of having the capacity to truly love, which is basic trust in the humanity of the other. Are you suspicious of your partner’s sincerity and genuineness when they are being ‘nice’ or generous? May be you are exasperated with your partner constantly doubting you and your motives, to the point of giving up on the attempt to connect and enjoy emotional intimacy. I bet that you have been in countless situations where you have made a real effort to listen and be supportive, but got received as if you were a fake. That hurt you and made you wonder “ what’s the point?” That basic trust you need to act on your desire is

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Capacity to Love -Five Attributes

By |2016-12-13T05:19:12+00:00July 21st, 2016|Anger Issues, Couples Counseling, couples therapy, Intimacy, relationship issues|

Do you ever wonder whether your partner has the capacity to love you , just for being you, rather than what you do for them? Are you often disheartened that your partner seems to focus on what you have done or not done, rather than care about your experiences? Maybe you had a similar experience of 'love' from a parent, who never seemed interested or joyful in your company, let alone genuinely into whatever was exciting for you. You know that feeling, when you long to share your joy or sadness, but instead of tuning into you and being happy with you and for you, the interaction switches to being about what they are needing from you. And, its not until you fulfill that need that you are 'loved.'

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5 Ways Self-Care Strengthens Relationships

By |2017-05-22T22:16:05+00:00June 13th, 2016|Couples Counseling|

Are you exhausted taking care of your partner, your family, your extended family, your colleagues and your living arrangements? Does it make you feel good that you attended to your partner and children, put them first and played the role of dutiful and loving care giver? Perhaps you think that by making everything and everyone else your priority that you will be rewarded with appreciation, recognition, and admiration. But there is probably another part of you that is aching to get off the treadmill and feed your soul. You know you are depleted and often not able to enjoy your relationship as much as you would if you didn't feel burdened with never ending duties and jobs. You know that most of the day you shut off your feelings and needs because they conflict with your dutiful self. So you kind of 'die' inside, feeling less than human. When you aren't able to fully enjoy your relationship, you put it in jepoardy. If you can't fully participate emotionally then the threads of connection get lose and threaten the unity between you. In order to avoid losing your connection, you have to take care of yourself and others. It's not an either or situation, it's a "both" scenario. It doesn't mean leaving them and going on trips or avoiding chores for a day or two, but rather a recognition of your humanity and the important role it plays in maintaining and sustaining your most important relationship.

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Pressing The Refresh Button On a Crumbling Marriage

By |2016-12-13T05:19:12+00:00July 21st, 2015|Anxiety therapy, Couples Counseling, Intimacy, relationship issues|

Have you hit a really rough spot in your marriage making it feel as if it's once strong and reliable foundation is about to crumble? Then you must be feeling very insecure and stressed. Do you wonder why your tried and trusted ways of being together and talking about things is no longer working? Perhaps the old ways are exactly the problem! When you first met your needs were different and you set up a system that suited you at the time. But now you have matured, become smarter with more experience. You may want the same things, but not in quite the same way. How do you have a conversation about that without making your partner feel criticized? How do you navigate without having a conflict?

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Do You and Your Partner Agree on Your Goals for Marriage?

By |2017-09-13T20:55:49+00:00July 7th, 2015|Anxiety therapy, Communication Problems, Couples Counseling, Intimacy, relationship issues|

Six months into their relationship, 35-year-old part time banker Simone’s patience was wearing thin. When if ever would 39-year-old reporter Miguel feel comfortable enough to propose marriage? She wanted to make sure she wasn’t dating a guy who would string her along and then quit. She thought she had done so by asking him directly and having got the answer she wanted, assumed it was just a matter of time. But there was no marriage proposal happened. Miguel spent more time away from Simone, and when he was around he was tired, played on his phone or went out with old friends. Yet he replied that he did want to marry but there were fears he had to overcome.

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Four Ways To Understand a Sexless Marriage and Make it Work

By |2016-12-13T05:19:13+00:00June 16th, 2015|Anxiety therapy, Couples Counseling, Intimacy, relationship issues|

What is a sexless marriage? Is it lack of intercourse, or lack of any sexual contact? Is affection a part of a sexless marriage, or is touching not allowed? Maybe a sexless marriage is when there is no sexual contact and intercourse for more than a year! Is it a lack of libido , or is it intercourse that is conducted as a ritual or routine duty?

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