Are you putting your partner in a role that makes it impossible for you to enjoy a sexual relationship? You may be casting you and your partner in subtle roles that make sex a taboo. Are you looking to be spoiled and wanted to the exclusion of all others? Those wishes may be getting in your way. Learn what those roles are, why they have such a grip on your sex life, and learn how to remove them.
When one partner shuts down and the other ramps up in a stressful conflict chances are that the men tune out and the women get heated up. Research indicates that male and female brains operate differently under stress making it more likely that couples will get frustrated and lose intimacy when they can't work things out. Learn three ways in which they can get on the same brain wave, same page and collaborate intimately on their joint problems.
If you feel dismissed and devalued when your loved one runs with information provided by a colleague or acquaintance even though you said the same thing, you probably have a ball of messy feelings that make you angry and insecure. You can ease your emotional stress by learning what might be going on in the mind of your loved one by watching this video and discovering that your loved one is far from dismissing you!
The more secrets you keep because you want to avoid conflict the more your marriage becomes a roommate situation. Your background will determine whether you work things out or you hope problems disappear. When two partners have these two opposite styles of dealing issues, marriages turn into convenient ways to manage finances. Learn how to find incentives where both styles can come together and create a dialogue where issues get dealt with before the marriage is one in name only.
If someone says they 'understand' and then sets out to change your feelings you are unlikely to feel truly understood. For you to feel like you are fully tuned into, takes acceptance and tolerance. When you are being pushed to change there is no tolerance for your feelings and that is what makes you feel unheard and misunderstood.
Learn how to prepare yourself for meeting with your date or loved ones so that your hopes and expectations don't get dashed in disappointment. Check in with yourself about what you are wanting and hoping for before you get lost in the fantasy and then have your bubble burst.
Keeping silent to protect your partner from feeling bad actually makes them feel worse. They get stressed, suspicious and feel estranged from you. Research indicates that avoiding one another works against successful relationships, and constant worry about the feelings of your partner makes you dissatisfied and want to opt out. Learn 3 ways to communicate honestly and build healthy connections.
When you are upset that you aren't as perfect as you aimed for, you may criticize yourself, feel bad about yourself and then withdraw from the people you love. Your sense of being imperfect makes you fearful of getting close. You turn inward and shut loved ones out, making your intimate connections dissolve. Research indicates that the self-critical part of perfectionism is the most destructive force to intimacy.
When you get that feeling that there's no point saying anything because you "know" how your loved one will react, you relive a frozen image of the past and kill any chances of connection. Get this tip on beginning a conversation to share your ideas, experience and feelings by asking questions that keep you both firmly grounded and fresh in your ever changing relationship and enjoy the contact!
The way you and your partner look at each other predicts healthy versus unhealthy intimacy, and ultimately your relationship satisfaction. Find out how your pattern of eye contact influences how you talk about your relationship and influences your sense of autonomy and togetherness.
