Hating your emotions and mistakes deprives you of the lesson they have to teach you. Benefit from tuning into their message to get the motivation you need to aim for the positive growth and relationship success that you richly deserve.
Don't go down feeling shocked and rejected. Use your surprise, anger and sadness to discover what you missed when you thought everything was just fine. Learn to read the signs before the relationship ends so that next time you will be able to act in a way that makes it work before it is too late.
When one partner shuts down and the other ramps up in a stressful conflict chances are that the men tune out and the women get heated up. Research indicates that male and female brains operate differently under stress making it more likely that couples will get frustrated and lose intimacy when they can't work things out. Learn three ways in which they can get on the same brain wave, same page and collaborate intimately on their joint problems.
If you feel dismissed and devalued when your loved one runs with information provided by a colleague or acquaintance even though you said the same thing, you probably have a ball of messy feelings that make you angry and insecure. You can ease your emotional stress by learning what might be going on in the mind of your loved one by watching this video and discovering that your loved one is far from dismissing you!
The more secrets you keep because you want to avoid conflict the more your marriage becomes a roommate situation. Your background will determine whether you work things out or you hope problems disappear. When two partners have these two opposite styles of dealing issues, marriages turn into convenient ways to manage finances. Learn how to find incentives where both styles can come together and create a dialogue where issues get dealt with before the marriage is one in name only.
Its stressful when you feel the overwhelming urge to prove that you know what you are talking about and are not a complete moron. It usually happens when you are in a conflict and you get ready for battle. Even though you know that success is unlikely you still expend every ounce of energy to prove yourself. Learn how to mange that obsession without shame and defeat, while recognizing that the person you are battling isn't the one you who made you feel so bad in the first place.
If someone says they 'understand' and then sets out to change your feelings you are unlikely to feel truly understood. For you to feel like you are fully tuned into, takes acceptance and tolerance. When you are being pushed to change there is no tolerance for your feelings and that is what makes you feel unheard and misunderstood.
If you are too scared to show your happiness to anyone else, chances are you are keeping them low key even from yourself. Perhaps you are scared someone will dismiss the feelings, envy you, make fun of you or just rob you and use your stuff to blow their own trumpet. Learn how to anchor your good feelings so that you retain ownership and enjoy them no matter what other agenda any one else has for you.
Panic attacks can shock and disturb your sense of equilibrium. Understanding their message can help you deal with the unfinished business left over from your past life. But first you have to get past the shame about having feelings, thoughts and needs that you no longer approve of. Panic attacks fill your radar with shame and force you to deal with things you have avoided but cannot afford to ignore any longer.
It's a great feeling to feel truly understood. It's very disappointing and frustrating when friends and loved ones say they understand you but show impatience, want you to change or shift your mood. There are two key elements in feeling understood. The first is acceptance but in very specific way. Learn about the many ways you can show and feel accepted in order to experience the sense of being understood and doing the same for your loved ones.
