Withdrawing from your romantic relationship isn't the only option you have when you feel your needs are not noticed or attended to. You four other choices that involve improving your communication and framing your expectations in ways that will get you the attention and respect you crave.
Do you want to know how to make sure to get your date to see you again? Learn how to put on your 3D emotional lens and check in with your traffic lights. Avoid miscommunication with crossed signals. Discover how you may be giving off red lights signals that put your date off, rather than the green lights that may turn them on.
If you are afraid of your partner's reaction to what you may share, then you probably avoid communicating about important things until a crisis arises. Leaving it so late creates a bad reaction and makes you more afraid, putting you in a negative loop. Learn the 3 steps you need to take to stop the anticipated fear and come from a confident place, solving things together and strengthening your intimate connections.
Wanting to feel valued and helpful to your partner is very normal and natural. It's frustrating when your efforts are rejected and problems just get worse. There is a secret to getting your help accepted and valued. It's about timing and setting the stage so that your partner will be receptive and hungry for your help. The right order of business is crucial. Learn the four step process to making sure your partner values your help.
It's infuriating and stressful when your loved ones ask you for your opinion but never heed it! They keep boosting you up by wanting your advice but then drop you like a hot potato as soon as you have given your wisdom and caring. It causes conflict that makes relationships tense and uncomfortable. Learn three ways in which you and your loved one can find room for both sets of views instead of going for one judge and jury.
When one partner shuts down and the other ramps up in a stressful conflict chances are that the men tune out and the women get heated up. Research indicates that male and female brains operate differently under stress making it more likely that couples will get frustrated and lose intimacy when they can't work things out. Learn three ways in which they can get on the same brain wave, same page and collaborate intimately on their joint problems.
The more secrets you keep because you want to avoid conflict the more your marriage becomes a roommate situation. Your background will determine whether you work things out or you hope problems disappear. When two partners have these two opposite styles of dealing issues, marriages turn into convenient ways to manage finances. Learn how to find incentives where both styles can come together and create a dialogue where issues get dealt with before the marriage is one in name only.
Its stressful when you feel the overwhelming urge to prove that you know what you are talking about and are not a complete moron. It usually happens when you are in a conflict and you get ready for battle. Even though you know that success is unlikely you still expend every ounce of energy to prove yourself. Learn how to mange that obsession without shame and defeat, while recognizing that the person you are battling isn't the one you who made you feel so bad in the first place.
It's a great feeling to feel truly understood. It's very disappointing and frustrating when friends and loved ones say they understand you but show impatience, want you to change or shift your mood. There are two key elements in feeling understood. The first is acceptance but in very specific way. Learn about the many ways you can show and feel accepted in order to experience the sense of being understood and doing the same for your loved ones.
When you can't seem to get through to your loved ones or they don't believe what you say it may be because you are giving mixed messages even though you feel clear and direct in your messages. Learn how to get all parts of your message in synch by orchestrating your emotions in an open and transparent way so that you come across as credible. Then you can have a dialogue based on what's really going on inside you rather than what others misinterpret or distort.
