Imagine if your partner suddenly said they were going to leave you? Would you be shocked, shaken, stunned and destabilized? You would feel insecure and stressed. Then you were probably imagining that everything was fine and that you had the near perfect relationship. Hardly any arguments, shared jobs and good sex. But what about the emotional intimacy?
gluttony from stress When you are overwhelmed and feel like you are sinking in quicksand, your body wants to flee from the threat. But your life style and schedule keep you trapped in a very a very stressful situation. You feel out of control You feel helpless You feel angry and resentful You are terrified of failing or having a breakdown You put even more effort into trying to be perfect and get everything done the way it should be so you can meet your own high standards and expectations You imagine others complimenting you and envying you BUT THE STRESS GETS TO YOU AND ALL YOU WANT IS FOOD. YOU WANT THE COMFORT AND THE NUMBNESS THAT EATING CAN BRING.
First dates can make you nervous because you have high hopes but fear being disappointed. You don't know whether you will be good enough for your date, or whether your partner will meet your requirements. All this pressure can wreck your date if you don't get grounded Your date will go fine is you are present in the here-and-now The best way of being present and available for a date is to avoid the following ten things
6 signs of abusive relationships If you are in an abusive relationship you probably don't know it. You don't recognize that your relationship is any different to others or to the one you grew up in. So here is a twelve item checklist to help you discover whether you are in an abusive relationship, so you don't have to suffer like the NFL'S Ray Rice's wife Jany, Ray McDonald's finance, Adrian Peterson's daughter, or Greg Hardy's domestic violence victims.
The fact that Ray Rice's finance married him despite being physically abused, means that the relationship was and continues to be extremely important to her. When someone is more afraid of losing a relationship than of being abused, they live with stress and insecurity, trying hard to make sure never to anger their partner. But that doesn't mean they have to live like that forever more! Attending couples therapy can make both Ray and his wife relate on a level that keeps their marriage strong but without the threat or experience of physical, verbal or emotional abuse.
It's frustrating when your kids are constantly bickering and you have to be referee. choosing one side or the other often makes you feel bad,and guilty later on. You wish your kids could get on with one another and let you attend to all the other things on your plate. But they don't! They are not invested in harmony or collaboration. They want ownership and control over what they feel is 'right.' So they fight and argue. They battle till they draw blood. And that's when you lose it! One of your children gets hurt, is sobbing uncontrollably and you are now furious at having to take time out to care for the hurt child, chastise the other and somehow bring order to chaos. Your anger probably comes from being forced to intervene. Your expectations of peaceful play were shattered and now you have to take charge and undo the mess.
1. In his book 'The Mindful Brain', Daniel Siegel describes mindulfulness as being aware of your mind and it's processes, so that you are not operating on auto pilot. 2. Mindful awarness involves reflection of what you are thinking, doing and feeling so that you are conscious of the choices you are making, and can opt for different ones to better your moment to moment, day to day life. Benefit: when you feel irritated and angry you can sense it in your body, as you tune into your muscle tension, teeth clenching and sighing. You can then formulate words to describe your anger, and then share it in the moment. It is experienced as genuine and the interaction can be shaped to include your feelings, adapting the converstion accordingly. You don't store anger and it doesn't build up into stress that makes you sick.
Ladies, did you know that men aren't just interested in sex and actually want to play and have fun with you? Research published in July 2014 from Columbia University School of Public Health found that young men want emotional closeness and not just sex. The American Sociology Society reported in August 2014 that it is women who have affairs do so for the sex when their passions aren't met by their husbands - they aren't interested in emotional intimacy or divorce. When you get too serious about being the 'perfect' partner your man feels that he no longer means anything to you, except a trophy, a 'Mr. Fixit' or an object of sex - just so you get to feel like you are doing your duty as a ma
Most couples I see in my therapy office say they want to feel like they are 'on the same team' and 'on the same page', but when we explore how they live their lives, there is very little sign of togetherness. Couples usually divide up the jobs that need to get done, and want recognition for it. So they spend their times separate from one and other and only come together for the short moment to get a pat on the back. Couples try to get their ideas and strategies for making life smooth onto the top of the list, without collaborating and making a joint list where they both have a valuable place.
Don't you just grit your teeth and want to tear your hair out with fury when your loved ones pretend they are not angry or upset, yet make snide remarks? Don't you feel that they are trying to be better than you, by trying to be in full control of their anger, only to let it out in far more cruel ways? Aren't you longing to get them to show their rage and be equally human with you? If so then you want to have a more authentic and intimate relationship, which involves being open and upfront with your emotions, including anger.
