When you are anxious about not being able to please your loved ones and putting the relationship at risk, you may be blurring the boundaries of responsibility, and become overwhelmed with anxiety. Learn the three ways you can get grounded and achieve your purpose without stress and anxiety turning you into a mess.
Wanting to feel valued and helpful to your partner is very normal and natural. It's frustrating when your efforts are rejected and problems just get worse. There is a secret to getting your help accepted and valued. It's about timing and setting the stage so that your partner will be receptive and hungry for your help. The right order of business is crucial. Learn the four step process to making sure your partner values your help.
Do you long to make the peace after tense interchanges with loved ones that make you wonder whether the relationship is still good? Perhaps you want to make things right so badly that you are willing to accept all the blame, be in the wrong and eat humble pie, just to make the peace again. Learn how you can do just that without losing face, without accepting all the responsibility for the fight and without putting yourself down. Discover how you can come from a place of entitlement to your feelings and needs and use that to set the scene for a new dialogue that creates peace by honoring and validating you and your loved ones.
If you are torn between being yourself but risking the rejection of loved ones in the process then you are stressed and it may come out in the form of lower back pain, reflecting unbearable burdens that you can't deal with. Discover how to find your power and strength to be yourself, grow and develop while hanging onto your relationships, provided you are up for some changes in the nature of the relationship.
If you are angry and tired of waiting for your partner to make good on a promise to commit to marriage and family then you are probably stressed and torn between staying in the hope of some movement and wanting to cut your losses. Learn 3 ways to help you decide what the costs and consequences are for you if you take the plunge and choose one side of your need. Take the pressure off yourself and your partner by looking at what is getting in the way and how to help your partner come out of the indecisive bubble.
Are you afraid that your partner's bad mood will bring you down and rob you of your good mood? If you try unsuccessfully to cheer your partner up so you can both connect from a good place then learn how to understand the tension and gap between you so that you don't feel like a failure. Discover how to come to terms with your varying emotional metabolic rates so that you will both be ready and available to one another when the tense moments have passed.
If you find that you can't get enough of good sex with your partner at some times but hate the thought of it later, you may be at the mercy of a set of mental factors that turn on the green light for short intervals, while staying on red for long spells. In the green light time zones you see each other as desirable and comforting, but during the red light time periods you perceive each other as robots who need to do their duty and kill off intimacy by making demands and comparisons that are impossible to overcome. Learn two ways you can keep the green light on for longer and on a lasting basis for your constant enjoyment of physical intimacy.
Saying good things about yourself to yourself each day can make you feel better and more confident in the short term. But soon you need to up the ante and make the statements even more elaborate, comparing yourself to others in a superior way. If that comes across to friends and loved ones, and it does whether you say it openly or not, you are destroying your relationships. Learn how to work with your poor self-esteem in ways that bring you closer to people so that they provide the foundation on which you can feel good for ever, naturally, never needing these artificial self-affirmations again.
Your sex life may be non-existent because of the roles you and your partner have assumed that makes sex impossible and bad! If you relate to each other as unequal master and slave, boss and worker, parent and child or enemies wanting the lions share of what is available, then sex as a loving act is out of the question. Learn how to avoid getting stuck in those destructive roles and enjoy your sex life again.
If you are infuriated when you don't receive an apology when someone has hurt you then you may end up stressed and helpless in your relationships. Learn how to communicate the impact the words and actions of others have on you so that they can tailor their behavior in ways that take your feelings into account.
