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Why Men Who Fear Women Become Raging Bulls

By | June 11th, 2015|Uncategorized|

Are you a man who is an obedient, loyal, dependable guy with your female partner? Do you give her the authority to make decisions, take the lead and initiative on parenting, spending money and organizing your social life? Then you may be very conficted about having no power yourself just so you can ensure that you are loved and cared for. Maybe you just don't know which part of you to go with? What will the consequences be if you take on a more authoritative role? How will it be if you continue to avoid asserting yourself? You know that inside you there is a raging bull ready to smash everything that smacks of needing to depend on your female partner for care.

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Are You and Your Partner Getting Off on Addictive Rage?

By | May 29th, 2015|Couples Counseling|

west los angeles anger management for couples Jackson just found out that his partner Stacey has been keeping a secret about a friendship with a past romantic friend. It all came spilling out when he saw a text message on her phone while she was in the bathroom and he was getting ready for bed. Stunned, he gave Stacey the cold shoulder when they got into bed. But inside he was smoldering. The lightest touch from Stacey ignited his rage, setting off a cascade of accusations that he wanted her to plead guilty to. Enraged and humiliated about being duped, Jackson wanted to get back in control. One part of him wanted to beat the truth out of her and feel strong doing it, while another part of him wanted a denial so the relationship remained secure. It was hard to know which part of himself he should fight for. Furious at his audacity, Stacey yelled that he was overreacting Jackson went ballistic. He just saw a text that made it clear that something is going on between them. It looked suspicious. How could she pretend he made it up? Jackson’s head throbbed and he felt his heart racing as he began interrogating Stacey He imagined all the ways he had been kept in the dark and made a fool of. His imagination ran riot, and he wanted to get every last drop of “admission ” out of her. Desperate to calm him down and get to sleep, Stacey decided to answer his questions directly hoping it would do the trick. There was no risk for her since she had nothing to hide. But each time she answered him Jackson’s fire got stoked again. To him, it was as if she was proving that there was no smoke without fire!

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Two Ways to Overcome the Anger When Your Partner Insists on Seeing You in a Negative Light

By | May 6th, 2015|Couples Counseling|

Do you feel frustrated and angry when other people like you, and see your worth, BUT your partner thinks you are a waste of space and is always complaining about you? Why be pushed and pulled, when you know who you really are and like it? All you get is insomnia, anxiety, pain and suffering. Maybe you have a wish that one day your partner will stop being blind and see what a treasure you are, and be eternally grateful! You know that it is unlikely, and that you can hope and wait for ever, OR you can take steps to fulfill that wish yourself. This video tells you how to do that by following 2 steps, on a consistent basis. Do it for yourself or work with me individually so that you can end your suffering.

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Dream About Failing an Interview Helped Damien Trust Himself (Part 3 of Damien’s story)

By | April 24th, 2015|Dreams|

After a great deal of doubt and uncertainty about choosing the right woman to marry, Damien finally married his fiancé. He felt peaceful and solid. The pendulum that swung between his attachment towards his mother and that toward Leila kept still. Working on the dream images about the day of his execution and that of the alligator had soothed his conflicted soul and allowed him to make the choice that had been so stressful. The first few weeks of marriage were good. The couple settled into a routine as he went back to work and Leila became a home maker. He enjoyed being welcomed home with a nice meal. Talking to his mate about his challenges at the lab where he worked was relieving. Having company watching TV and a warm receptive body next to him at night was comforting. But three months into the marriage, Damien found himself wanting to do his own thing after the evening meal. He went back to doing the solitary things he used to do before he got married. Leila read books about married life and fed him information about what couples should do at certain points in their marriage – such as have sex three to four times a week in their first six months together. They were supposed go out with other couples twice a week, and visit in-laws at least once a month.

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Shameful Anger is Detoxifed By the Pain of a Bone Fracture

By | April 7th, 2015|Anger Management Counseling|

A long awaited vacation was coming up for thirty-nine-year-old Alex who was looking forward to seeing his younger sister Fiona, 3000 miles away. He wanted to go with her to an exhibition of ancient and modern pottery that they both loved. Practicing throwing pots in a class on ceramic ware, he had made a gift for Fiona’s family using a special design with a color tint of his creation. A week before his flight to Salem Oregon where Fiona lived with her husband and two children, Alex began to imagine that Fiona would be too busy to join him in visiting the exhibits and having fun at their old haunts. He recalled previous occasions when he had high hopes of rekindling their childhood closeness, only to find that she was either non-committal, busy, or with him in body but not in spirit.

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Three Ways to Control Rage When You Feel Abandoned

By | March 25th, 2015|Couples Counseling|

The sounds of begging and pleading for another chance fell on32-year-old Trudy’s deaf ears. Her 35-year-old husband Max had promised to stop using alcohol and drugs umpteen times, but he never got sober for more than a day or two. She had been let down too often, and now needed to protect herself from being seduced by those pitiful eyes, and his attentive ways. Enraged at losing Trudy and their 5 year old daughter Sasha, Max spent most of his time enraged that he couldn’t get Trudy to listen to him. There was no other woman for him. He wanted her to pick him up when he was down and do the same for her. The only problem was that he remembered the good times and she remembered the bad times.

Anger Makes You Swing From One Type of Depression to Another

By | March 13th, 2015|Depression Counseling|

You may find it hard to believe that anger may be at the root of your sad and lethargic feelings when you get depressed. But the link between anger and depression has been established centuries ago by the Greek philosophers and then more scientifically by the turn of the 19th century. Treatment with SSRI's is the most widely practiced medication route. But recent research shows that there are two types of depression and that SSRI's are at best no better than a placebo (sugar pill) and that where they are effective, they are more helpful (with psychotherapy) for one more than the other.

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Six Ways to Avoid Anger, Stress and Depression That Ruin Your Relationships

By | February 24th, 2015|Couples Counseling|

Working as a risk management specialist for a large medical group was getting 36-year-old Juliette down. She was exhausted and had no energy left for her husband, 38-year-old Elliot and their 5 and 6 year old children Aden and Mara. She hated having to work, but was the only breadwinner. The pressure on Juliette made her depressed. All she wanted to do was to sleep. She left the chores to her Elliot who attended to them with pride, seeing them as his contribution to the family. Even when she was awake, Juliette felt fatigued and disinterested in playing with her kids. She preferred to look on as Elliot engaged them in cycling, swimming and ball games. She was easily upset when things didn’t go right with the family, and felt useless as a mother, sister and wife. Depression had taken hold, and Juliette was steeped in a lack of self-worth. Her anger at having to be the breadwinner was buried in the depression, as was her disappointment and resentment towards her husband for not taking on that role.

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How To Stop the Cycle of Love Turning into Anger and Hate

By | February 10th, 2015|Blog|

Do you hate your loved one so much that you want to hurt them and make them feel your pain? Are you so enraged when they seem to be loving and then switch off? It's natural for you to feel angry when you are given with one hand and then another and takes it away before you've even tasted it. The stress of having/not having pumps you up with adrenaline. THE THREE D'S OF ANGER, AND STRESS ENGULF YOU

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How a Dream about an Alligator Helped Damien Choose Between His Mother and his Girfriend! Part 2

By | January 27th, 2015|Blog, Dreams|

The dream that helped Damien understand the trap he was in, fearing commitment and choices was the first of a series that helped him prepare to propose to his girlfriend and adjust his relationship with his mother. Now he was ready to propose, but how would his mother react? The eldest of three children, Damien felt responsible for his mother’s welfare. His younger siblings were in college and his father wasn’t reliable. Damien enjoyed getting advice on ‘the right thing to do,’ from his mother, who also took care of him in ways that made their bond special. He knew his mother wanted him to marry a girl that came from the same ethnic and religious background. There was nothing more important to him than his prospective wife and mother getting along. Would his mother approve of Leila? Would they find a way of relating without making him choose between them? Would Leila be okay with him visiting his mother after church every Sunday? Would Leila be okay with him continuing to take care of his mother’s car insurance payments?