Garret found it hard to move on from the experience. He made abusive statements about the driver who cut him. His body became tense and stiff as if he was protecting himself from being taken off guard again. Garret got another attack of low back pain that always seemed to affect him when he was angry and unable to do anything about it. It reminded him of that feeling of outrage and helplessness when Astrid broke her promise by choosing her family over his for the big holiday celebrations. He had felt deeply betrayed and disregarded. He had never forgiven her disloyalty. He wasn’t going to let that happen again this year. He couldn’t allow himself to forgive and forget because that would be asking for more.
Fibromyalgia made it hard for 46 year old Vera to get her legs out of bed in the morning. As she moved toward the bathroom and began her toilette the pangs of pain moved to her hands, head and neck. It brought tears to her eyes. It made her angry to think that Kurt hadn’t even thought of organizing things around the house to make life a little easier for her. Vera remembered the arguments about accompanying her on doctors appointments and got even more angry. But she never said anything to him. She turned her mind to the support group she would attend later that day, although it wasn’t successful in easing her physical discomfort.
The thought of spending five hours at his parents’ anniversary party made Roger feel tired and anxious. That’s when the ringing in his ears started. It was barely noticeable while he was getting dressed, but the tinnitus became loud and jarring as he thought of having to endure the pointed questions, and being told what to do and how to do it.
No matter how patient he was or how many allowances he made, at the end of the day he felt dumped. Just as he was looking forward to looking for a house and planning the details of the wedding Sheila backed out saying she couldn’t go through with it. She wasn’t ready. She was very sorry, especially as this was a repeat of what had happened before, but it wasn’t going to work out. Neville was in shock. This was the closest he had ever gotten to tying the knot with someone he was nuts about, and it all fell apart. Would he ever get married? Would he ever find that magic that his parents seemed to have and that he desperately wanted to capture?
Anita’s symptoms ebbed and flowed with each new change in diet and routine. But her general level of fatigue, pain and swelling hampered her work with clients. She became more self-conscious and less social as a result. Anita’s natural awareness and sensitivity to her body heightened to levels that made it difficult to focus and concentrate on anything else. Anita was a intelligent and conscientious person, self-sufficient and dedicated to her craft of body fitness. For Anita, a healthy body was the gateway to a healthy attitude, and balanced life. What Anita didn’t realize is that her emotional life also played a part in creating mind-body harmony.
Do you cringe when your partner starts venting ? Does it feel like your partner is venting at you and that you just have to take it? Are you afraid that if you don't absorb the attack you won't exist for your partner? Then you are caught in a tight spot. It's stressful when power games are at play. Your wish to be something important even if it is a bag for your partner to dump all their anger and frustration, prevents you from showing up as a human being with feelings, on a equal footing with your partner. Watch this video and learn how to allow the venting but not let the attack destroy you for the sake of being connected.
The Resolute Jim Gets Wiped Out The Jim of the last seven months had just been obliterated by the savage betrayal he had just witnessed. He felt as if she had been propelled into another world with no land legs, and no compass to find his way to safety. Some automatic part of him had rushed to the nearest store and bought a pack of cigarettes. Grasping the familiar white tube, lighting it, and inhaling it was like finding his way home. The rush of nicotine mobilized his survival instincts, uncorking his rage to fuel his fighting spirit.
The bidding war for Mervin's first musical score was through the roof. It was too good to be true. Hours before the contracts were to be signed the offers were dropped. It felt like an execution. Mervin gave away his guitar and burned all his original compositions. He started a new life in the food industry. He couldn't afford to nurture his talent if it betrayed him with such savage blows of disappointment. Mervin sealed the door to his musical skills, axed the desire to compose, and became a workaholic.
Jody was a loner, loved to read and listen to music. She woke up most mornings burdened with the weight of the day ahead. She felt tired and worn out even before she began the day, anticipating what people might think of her. She was concerned with who was looking over her shoulder, waiting to accuse her of doing something wrong. She expected to encounter situations that she wouldn't be able to handle. Memories of inadvertently upsetting people in the past invaded her mind. Uncomfortable past experiences infected the present, as Jody was whipped up into a froth of palpitating anxiety.
Do you keep silent in conversations with certain of your friends and or loved ones because you think there is no point talking? Are you anticipating being made to feel silly, stupid, and then shut down? Perhaps you decide to just get through the interaction without taking the risk, but you pay a price of gagging yourself. Does the anger build later on? Do you fume and try to exert yourself in other ways to compensate? Whatever you do, the same fear rules you and makes relationships stressful and unsatisfying. Unless you find your sense of entitlement to be a player and participate. Watch this video and you will find out how to do that so that you don't have to suffer that old anticipatory fear that keeps you small, silent and furious. Give yourself the pleasure of making sure you have healthy emotional intimacy that is the foundation of all good relationships.